An open letter to all writers, wannabes and just anyone out there:
Let's talk. Or more importantly, you need to talk to yourself. I don't mean that in some weird way, like please get some medication for this insanity. I mean it more in the sense of it's time for you to check up on yourself and your work. I know that my audience are people like me, around my age, and/or share similar interests. So here it is, I have to produce a lot of papers and written work for my education. I will have to produce even more than what I do now for my post-secondary education - I'm talking like an absolute ton more. My biggest fear with my writing is that my content is lame, tired and over done. I'm worried that I am not always vulnerable enough with my writing, and that reading my work is as interesting as staring at the graffiti on a brick wall.
Vulnerability is a difficult thing to master these days. Or if you're like me, it's been a difficult thing to master any and every day. I do not understand where exactly to draw the line between creating intriguing content and spilling my neurotic self all over the page. Getting close with people and emotions, kind of freaks me out, so I don't really enjoy doing that. When it comes to writing, I am worried of giving too many pieces of myself away to the audience - what scares me even more is if they're disgusted by what I have given to them. However, what I have slowly learned over the years, from eating, sleeping, writing then repeating that routine, is that my best work are always the ones that I fall into. I'm talking about the papers that I was so excited to write about, the ones with topics that I passionately talked about, and especially the ones that once I started typing, my fingers couldn't seem to stop. I kept finding more and more of my thoughts and feelings being expressed and shared between those lines. In those spaces, I find my love for literature and writing so extremely prominent. Writing with this flow of energy and readiness, seems to be my nirvana. Within this 'enlightenment' that I have found from producing those countless papers and stories, is that vulnerability is required to make yourself the best writer possible.
A few nights ago, when I was up late reading a book, I came across lines that resonated within me. I read,
'Secret truths are the lifeblood of a writer. Your memories and your own secrets. Forget plot, character, structure; if you're going to call yourself a writer, you need to stick your hand in the mire up to the wrist, the elbow, the shoulder, and drag out your darkest most private truth.'
When I read those lines, I felt like everything that has ever been said about getting real with your writing and letting a side of yourself into your work, was so elegantly and realistically summed up. Maybe not necessarily only to be a writer is this applicable, but almost with practically everything. Forget about the technicalities and the "dos and don'ts," just look within yourself to create something brilliant. Thus, no longer will I give just the tiniest bit of myself to my work, but my full mind and effort. I don't want to only feel like I eat, sleep, write, and repeat, I want to create something that I and others can fall in love with each time the work is read.
So, here my hand will go into the mire.
I hope that you take this leap of faith with me.
Yours truly,
Sarah
Fuller, Claire. Swimming lessons. London: Fig Tree, an imprint of Penguin , 2017. Print.